Week 9 in the SEC provides few decent games, but awesome rumors - Tucson News Now

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Week 9 in the SEC provides few decent games, but awesome rumors

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Georgia defenders are depicted tackling a player from Kentucky, which wears uniforms similar to Florida's. Don't expect to see this level of domination against Florida. (Source: John Kelley)) Georgia defenders are depicted tackling a player from Kentucky, which wears uniforms similar to Florida's. Don't expect to see this level of domination against Florida. (Source: John Kelley))
  • South CarolinaMore>>

  • Gamecocks drop 2014 National Championship to Georgia in tiebreaker

    Gamecocks drop 2014 National Championship to Georgia in tiebreaker

    Sunday, April 20 2014 10:03 AM EDT2014-04-20 14:03:55 GMT
    (Source: Facebook) (Source: Facebook)
    WACO, Texas - No. 1 South Carolina's bid for a third overall national championship fell short on Saturday, as the Gamecocks lost the championship meet in a tiebreaker to the University of Georgia at the
    WACO, Texas - No. 1 South Carolina's bid for a third overall national championship fell short on Saturday, as the Gamecocks lost the championship meet in a tiebreaker to the University of Georgia at the
  • Gamecocks rally in 9th for 3-2 win over Auburn

    Gamecocks rally in 9th for 3-2 win over Auburn

    Sunday, April 20 2014 9:57 AM EDT2014-04-20 13:57:11 GMT
    AUBURN, ALA. – Down a run entering the ninth inning, sixth ranked South Carolina stormed back with a pair of runs on RBI hits from freshmen Gene Cone and Jordan Gore to defeat Auburn 3-2 on Saturday in
    AUBURN, ALA. – Down a run entering the ninth inning, sixth ranked South Carolina stormed back with a pair of runs on RBI hits from freshmen Gene Cone and Jordan Gore to defeat Auburn 3-2 on Saturday in
  • Gamecocks defeat TCU, 9-7, to advance to NCEA semifinals

    Gamecocks defeat TCU, 9-7, to advance to NCEA semifinals

    Friday, April 18 2014 11:01 PM EDT2014-04-19 03:01:40 GMT
    (Source: Facebook)(Source: Facebook)
    WACO, Texas - Led by a pair of 3-1 wins by its reining and flat teams, No. 1 seed South Carolina defeated No. 9 TCU, 9-7, on Friday in the NCEA Quarterfinals at the Extraco Events Center. The Gamecocks
    WACO, Texas - Led by a pair of 3-1 wins by its reining and flat teams, No. 1 seed South Carolina defeated No. 9 TCU, 9-7, on Friday in the NCEA Quarterfinals at the Extraco Events Center. The Gamecocks
  • LSUMore>>

  • LSU adds home-and-home series with Syracuse

    LSU adds home-and-home series with Syracuse

    Wednesday, April 16 2014 11:46 PM EDT2014-04-17 03:46:13 GMT
    From LSU Sports BATON ROUGE –LSU has added a home-and-home series with Syracuse in football starting with a game at the Carrier Dome in 2015, LSU Vice Chancellor and Director of Athletics Joe Alleva
    LSU football has added a home-and-home series with Syracuse starting in 2015. LSU also announced that the Tigers will open the 2015 season against McNeese State in Tiger Stadium.
  • ESPN to televise LSU-Wisconsin game in Houston

    ESPN to televise LSU-Wisconsin game in Houston

    Wednesday, April 16 2014 11:30 PM EDT2014-04-17 03:30:36 GMT
    From LSU Sports BATON ROUGE – LSU's season-opener against Wisconsin on Aug. 30 at Reliant Stadium in Houston will kickoff at 8 p.m. CT and will be televised by ESPN, the Southeastern Conference and the
    LSU's season-opener against Wisconsin on Aug. 30 at Reliant Stadium in Houston will kickoff at 8 p.m. CT and will be televised by ESPN.
  • Tigers perform drills for coaches at LSU Pro Day

    Tigers perform drills for coaches at LSU Pro Day

    Wednesday, April 9 2014 5:30 PM EDT2014-04-09 21:30:55 GMT
    With the NFL draft a month away, the LSU football players looking to move on to the next level are down to few opportunities left to show teams their worth. LSU reported 17 players from the 2013 squad
    With the NFL draft a month away, the LSU football players looking to move on to the next level are down to few opportunities left to show teams their worth.

(RNN) - Florida plays Georgia in a game that is going to decide the East Division Championship, unless something unimaginable happens. Alabama plays a ranked team at last. Missouri has a real chance to win its first SEC game, but please, fans, don't tear down the goal post if you beat Kentucky.

And it's that time of year when the rumors are more entertaining most games.

All times Eastern

Kentucky at Missouri Noon, ESPNU

Well, Missouri, here's your chance. You're a 14-point favorite over Kentucky, which is probably overconfident after only losing to Wildly Overrated Georgia (WOG) 29-24 last week. Show us what you've got.

Actually, we won't be watching, but seriously, have a good day.

Tennessee at No. 13 South Carolina, Noon, ESPN

We're so loving the rumors that Derek Dooley is going to be fired and replaced by John Gruden. What would really be awesome would be a sort of a trial run, like, if they'd let Gruden do the postgame interviews the rest of the year after Tennessee loses.

He's funny, telegenic, smart and a great talker, hence the extension of his contract as a broadcaster at ESPN, which keeps releasing statements that he's not going to leave the booth to return to coaching in the NFL at San Diego, Miami or St. Louis or any of the other places he's been rumored to go. And if he's not going to do that, why would a guy who has never recruited a day in his life go to coach at a college, such as Tennessee? But logic is no fun when it comes to football rumors.

So take a moment and imagine Gruden doing postgame loser interviews if he weren't responsible for the losses, like he was during those dark, depressing years at Tampa Bay. He would be funnier than Dane Cook.

But then, everybody is funnier than Dane Cook. Why is that guy a famous comedian? Maybe he could be the next coach at Tennessee.

South Carolina has toppled from the exalted status it briefly enjoyed before losing a close one at LSU then getting its head, arms, legs, hands, feet and torso handed to it by Florida last week.

Bad game. Bad, BAD game. You get down off that couch, this minute!

Mississippi at Arkansas, 12:21 p.m., SEC Network

Ole Miss is 4-3 and Arkansas is 3-4 and both are feeling real spunky right now. Ole Miss slaughtered Auburn two weeks ago then took a bye week, and Arkansas, which has always had good players, beat… um… Auburn, of course, and, uh, Kentucky.

OK, neither team has any right to feel good about itself, this game's another stinker and I'd rather drink bleach than sit through it. One or both of these teams is probably going to a bowl game, which makes me want to move to a continent where nobody's ever seen a goal post.

No. 2 Florida vs. Wildly Overrated No. 10 Georgia (WOG) 3:30 p.m., CBS

A few years back, the SEC issued an edict that this game should no longer be referred to as "The World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party" because that condoned having cocktails outdoors before, during and after college football games, a thing up with which the league would not put.

I'm all about respect and decorum, so I'll comply. Instead, I shall refer to this game as Gateway to Getting Crushed by Alabama in the SEC Championship Game.

Florida, it's all you, baby. Beat WOG and you're on the rails to the SEC East title, a November beatdown in the ATL, and the Sugar Bowl. Great restaurants in New Orleans, you'll love it there. Try the gumbo.

No. 20 Texas A&M at Auburn 7 p.m., ESPNU

Speaking of excellent rumors, have you heard the one about Bobby Petrino taking over at Auburn if and when poor Gene Chizik gets fired after the total catastrophe this season has become?

To wit: Texas A&M is a two-TD favorite. In Auburn. Any questions?

You will recall, Petrino lost his job at Arkansas last spring when he lied about wrecking his Harley-Davidson while zipping through the countryside with his much-younger, engaged blonde mistress with whom he was having an adulterous affair. She was also his employee.

Petrino is also the guy former Auburn bigwigs snuck off in a booster's jet to visit in Louisville back in 2003 because they wanted to hire him. But they got caught, extending for five more years the agonizing tenure of Tommy Tuberville, whom The Auburn Family disliked because he lost to Alabama, Vanderbilt and Arkansas (sound familiar?).

If Petrino gets the Auburn job, they should make him coach in a pimp hat.

UMASS at Vanderbilt 7 p.m., ESPN3

I know what you are thinking, but wait, this is really significant. Vandy is 3-4. A win here, and next week at Kentucky, and the Commies only need to beat Ole Miss, Tennessee or Wake Forest, and they're in a bowl for the SECOND STRAIGHT YEAR.

OK, you can go back to sleep now.

No. 11 Mississippi State at No. 1 Alabama 8:30 p.m., ESPN

Alabama has not played a ranked team since demolishing then No. 6 ranked Michigan in the season opener, and that's been the rallying cry for those resisting the impulse to award the national championship to the Crimson Tide right now and allow everyone else to play for second place.

However, this week, Alabama welcomes undefeated Mississippi State, ranked 13th by the Associated Press and No. 11 in the BCS, so there's that.

However, there's still wiggle room in case Alabama turns the upstart Bulldogs into a grease spot like everybody else this year.

Mississippi State has fattened up on SEC lesser lights and non-FBS schools with not-so-good records. They beat Auburn, Kentucky and Tennessee along with Jackson State, Troy, South Alabama and Middle Tennessee.

If Alabama loses, or barely wins, then, "We told you so" is always good.

Oh, yeah, and that rumor Nick Saban's going to the Cleveland Browns? Probably not.

Copyright 2012 Raycom News Network. All rights reserved.

  • Southeastern ConferenceMore>>

  • Bama, Auburn, Mizzou hold spring games

    Bama, Auburn, Mizzou hold spring games

    Friday, April 18 2014 12:47 PM EDT2014-04-18 16:47:53 GMT
    (RNN) - Three more SEC teams have their spring football games on Saturday, April 19 as the spring practice season winds down. Auburn's A-Day Game will be televised on ESPN at 3 p.m. ET. The Tigers will
    Auburn, Alabama and Missouri will finish up spring practice with spring games. Auburn and the Crimson Tide will have their A-Day games televised.
  • Missouri dismisses WR Green-Beckham from team

    Missouri dismisses WR Green-Beckham from team

    Missouri wide receiver Dorial Green-Beckham, once heralded as the No. 1 recruit in the nation out of high school, has been kicked off the team.
    Missouri decided enough was enough.
  • Review: Mizzou didn't follow federal assault rules

    Review: Mizzou didn't follow federal assault rules

    An independent report says the University of Missouri failed to follow parts of the federal law that governs sexual harassment when handling the case of a former swimmer's suicide.
    An independent report released Friday says the University of Missouri failed to follow parts of the federal law that governs sexual harassment on campus when handling the case of a former swimmer's suicide.
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